- November 23, 2023
- Posted by: legaleseblogger
- Category: Related News
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Feeling Overwhelmed: Desperate Situation leading up to My Husband’s Sentencing
The upcoming sentencing of my husband is causing me extreme distress as I have recently learned that the prosecutor is seeking to increase his sentence and impose lifetime probation. This news has left me feeling mentally unprepared, as I had finally come to terms with the originally agreed upon sentence. Additionally, the prosecutor insists that our children be present for the sentencing, a request that I vehemently oppose. It is agonizing to know that I cannot prevent my ex-husband from exposing our child to such a traumatic experience, just as I am unable to stop my husband’s ex-wife from doing the same with their daughter. It all feels like a sick and twisted nightmare.
Compounding the stress of this ordeal is the fact that my husband has a severe heart condition, having already undergone two open-heart surgeries during his childhood. Despite knowing for years that he would require additional surgery, the current situation has expedited this need. Regrettably, he is not receiving the necessary medication or access to regular medical care while in prison. The fear that he may die in prison is consuming me, leaving me more scared than I have ever been in my life. These circumstances have left me struggling to maintain composure, and the enormity of it all feels almost unbearable.
I deeply appreciate the opportunity to express my feelings in this safe space. Thank you for taking the time to read my words.
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Is his case state or federal?
I can’t speak for the state system, but I did serve a couple years at a federal medical center (FMC). I can tell you that the medical care at one of those is much better than what you’d get at a typical federal prison. If his case is federal, make sure that his lawyer requests one at his sentencing.
“I also found out that the prosecutor wants our children to attend sentencing. I refuse to take my child and involve her in that traumatic experience, but I canÔÇÖt stop my ex-husband from taking her.”
Do they have some kind of summons order on her, and if so, who filed for it?
I’m not sure of anyone’s beliefs, but I did want to share my experience. It might not help , but I’m hoping it will.
I was looking at 15 years with the possibility of an ankle monitor for life. I was denying my guilt for 5 months while I was in jail. I was reading the Bible and praying for God to save me. I said “Lord I’ve confessed to you, and I know you’ve forgiven me. Do I really need to confess to anyone else? I mean, even the Bible doesn’t say to tell anyone.” Oh, how wrong I was. I kept reading and came across the most hated verse ever, James 5:16. Now my most cherished verse. James said, “Confess to men and be healed.” I did not want to see that at the time, but there it was clear as could be. Days and weeks went by, and God kept bringing this verse to mind and poking me with it, like a cattle prod. I kept trying to follow Him but kept ignoring this verse. I finally gave in one morning and confessed to my cell mates.
Not two days later, I was able to make bail. As soon as I got out, I confessed to my wife and the rest of my family. They were upset, of course, but at least the truth was out there. Then came time to tell my lawyer before I did he was telling me how he was going to shred my victim to pieces with questions and make her cry he didn’t care how young she was. I wanted to get away with my crime, but when I heard his plan, I knew I could not let her get victimized and traumatized further because of me. Especially since I was, in fact, guilty. So I told him the truth. He immediately changed the plan and told me we had to take a plea deal, which would mean a sentencing from 4 months to 7 years. I was instantly relieved. I was still scared but clung to God and kept praying. I wore my best clothes to the court a few days later and confessed to the judge. She sentenced me to 4 months in prison. I was so happy that although I was being put in handcuffs, I felt free. The truth had set me free. God set me free and honored that I told the truth.
It wasn’t all a happy story my wife did leave me, and I haven’t seen my kids in over 3 years. But I have hope all will be well eventually. I do get to talk to them through phone calls.
I guess what I’m trying to say is pray to God and bring your request of wanting to spare the children and help your husband as he sees fit. I believe if you really cling to God, then he will honor your request if you truly want it with the purest of intentions. Nothing is too difficult for God.
God bless you and your family, I will be praying for you all.
I’m so sorry that you, your children, and spouse are going through this awful situation. I hope that all of you involved can get the help needed to heal and cope with any trauma coming from it all.
There seems to be some things missing here. Mainly bc I’m not understanding why a judge would want children present at a sentencing.
Even if they were the victims, your lawyer should call for this to be cruel and unusual punishment for the children to be forced to be there. As a victim, a victim statement should be read on their behalf and ONLY if both the CPS and/or other child protective authorities agree should they be there to read their own statement.
This could be something to keep in mind for an appeal. **I am not a lawyer. But keep track of all peculiarities like this for an appeal. It is very difficult to go against a judge’s orders, mind you. But when the mental health of the child is seemingly being neglected, perhaps there is more to it.
Please explain all of this and more to your PSR pre-sentencing report officer in writing. There is for federal cases an assigned officer who will create a workup not damning the defendant but allowing a federal judge to consider the whole character and quality of person and who they are most likely to be valuable to.
I was very surprised at the quality of research and the judge really used that to push back against federal prosecuters.
Do you have a draft of your PSR? Did it cover everything ?
Have you thought of asking for a plea bargain or is the time too late and you are heading to sentencing?
Best advise I can give you is to have your attorney request the judge recommend either an FMC or FCI Englewood in Colorado because it is a sex offender treatment prison. It’s very easy time there with a lot of elderly inmates so the medical isn’t the worst. There were at least two people that went out for heart surgeries while I was there.