- September 13, 2023
- Posted by: legaleseblogger
- Category: Related News
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Do you ever experience the relatable frustration and disillusionment akin to Frank Grimes from the iconic television show, The Simpsons? This introspective question allows us to delve into the complexities of comparing oneself to others and recognizing the inherent unfairness that may arise from such contemplation. In an effort to maintain impartiality, it is vital not to provide a personal response to this query.
For those who are unacquainted with Frank Grimes or The Simpsons, a simple online search will unveil the character and his story arc. Alternatively, we can rephrase the question to be more inclusive and unambiguous:
Have you ever found yourself drawing comparisons to individuals within your socioeconomic status and realizing the inexplicable disparities that exist? I’m not referring to comparisons with flashy celebrities or billionaires, but rather the ordinary individuals who share comparable circumstances and opportunities.
Allow me to recount an anecdote about a friend who expressed profound dissatisfaction with the seemingly unjust circumstances surrounding one of his peers. This individual earned a full-time salary of $90K, despite only committing a mere 8-10 hours of actual work per week. Furthermore, this fortunate person had wealthy parents who generously provided a staggering $200K+ for a home down payment. In addition, they had the luxury of frequent state and international travel, all without any substantial professional responsibilities.
Let me emphasize that I present this narrative without advocating for any notion of right or wrong, or endorsing feelings of jealousy, envy, or alignment with Frank Grimes. Rather, I pose this question solely to encourage contemplation and provoke discussion. Are there instances in your life where you have related to the character of Frank Grimes? If so, what were the underlying reasons behind such sentiments? Conversely, if you have not experienced these emotions, what factors contribute to your immunity?
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****** just grabbed a
i think its normal, even though you’re sorta asking in the wrong forum to get validated.
I think especially as get deeper into your 20s and 30s, class differences become more apparent. Particularly with property, some of your peers just get given a deposit or a house and others have to grind for like 5-10 years just to end up with something nowhere near as good. When you’re in school, the money belongs to parents so everyones broke and dependent, shit changes and it can be jarring.
I mean Frank ‘Grimey’ Grimes obsession with Homer led to his untimely demise, ironically trying to prove how incompetent Homer was.
Moral of the story, don’t be like Grimey
Kill your friend ? And do a talented Mr Ripley?
Could have started the post with
ÔÇ£Have you ever, ever felt like this?ÔÇØ
The moral of Frank Grimes vs Homer Simpson story is that life isn’t fair and that comparing yourself to others will destroy you.
For all that grimey had achieved and overcome there was someone less worthy than him that had more in life. Although an academically smart man grimey was emotionally infantile and his hatred for homer eventually killed him.
So if your feeling like Frank Grimes the problem lies with you my friend. The world is never going to be fair. You will never be vindicated in feeling this way. The only path and the best thing for you to do is to not be like Grimey.
Practicing gratitude for what you do have is a great way to re-centre your perspective and to care less about others.
I feel more like Lenny [in this scene](https://frinkiac.com/video/S09E09/Ap841GCaPSp9GwvuF-4IC78Mkv8=.gif)
i simply think envy comes easier to some than others.
I have a friend much like yours, where its a default setting, particularly on income. the irony is they recieved an inheritance that allowed them to get into the housing market, and are regularly bailed out by family when they get underwater with their credit card etc, but they still get envious about the income of others.
Not defending that person, but they are an old friend, who im fond of despite this predisposition. i simply learnt that they will struggle with knowing more than is necessary when i get a new job etc, because i know how easily any financial information will make them feel small.
A politically polarising figure,whose name I wonÔÇÖt say to avoid bias, had a very good take on people like that.
They basically said:
You canÔÇÖt compare yourself to others because youÔÇÖre so unique as an individual that thereÔÇÖs no possible way to have a fair comparison. No one has your genes, your family, your level of consciousness, your strengths and weaknesses.
You may see some guy driving down the street in a ferrari and a super model girlfriend. Little do you know the guy is one fight with his dad away from intentionally wrapping his car around a telephone poll with him inside it, and his girlfriend is a relapsing drug addict.
Point of the story is most peoples lives are so unique and individual the only person you can really ever compare yourself to is yourself.
[original clip](https://youtu.be/CPT2srRyJlg?si=AMMj2C2UQjXrAuLt)
“Comparison is the thief of joy.”
There will always be someone who has more, earns more, and has an easier time getting to where you want to be. But living in Australia, statistically, you’re going to have far more than most people on the planet.
If you can’t look both ways when it comes to comparison, then you have no meaningful perspective.
Oh yeah, how is olÔÇÖ grimey?
Financially I don’t envy others for what that work for or inherited. I grew up in a neglectful home with parents who didn’t work and lived off Centrelink.
I do however find sadness in “whole” families, the families where grandparents help out and are loving, supportive and present. I don’t have that with my babies, they are sent to daycare and when I suffered with severe PPD and no one came to help me, it hurt. So when I hear how grandma picked up baby x and they spent the day out together or how grandpa comes and watches the kids play sport, I am sad and envious and I wish I wasn’t grieving something I can’t have, obviously it affects my earning potential compared to those whose families do step in and help too so it just means we are standing still for a few years.
Most of the time I feel like Homer except I don’t have wife and kids and my place is the one sandwiched between bowling alleys, but I feel like your predicament is precisely why I don’t invite people over for lobster dinners and avoid going to other people’s places for lobster dinners.
Yes normal. Especially if you have immigrant parents and you begin to see how rife nepotism and old boys networks are in australia, professionally.
And even ignoring that just how far ahead people are by just having a property or two in the familly before 2003.
Or just having a grandparent with a average quater acre block within 20km of the cbd.
I definitely know what you mean and my issue is very specific.
People who are often handed 200k+ for a house from their parents or inherited something valuable will generally try to take this as their own hard work and then boast about it.
It’s very frustrating to hear someone say “you just have to work hard like us and make the right financial decisions and you can have this 1 million dollar house” while sort of talking down to you and implying that you must be making the wrong decisions if you aren’t on the same level as them.
Life is absolutely unfair. The sooner you realise that the better you will be. Make the most of what you have been given. The chances of you existing at all are so remote, it’s unwise to spend your days comparing yourself to others.
ItÔÇÖs normal to be a bit jealous when something great happens to others. But thereÔÇÖs a difference between wishing it had happened to you and thinking that it should have happened to you because you deserve it more.
People arenÔÇÖt great at articulating whether they feel the first or second way. Your friend might actually mean he wishes it happened to him.
I got all Frank Grimes about a colleague. The willingness by companies to ignore certain behaviour and incompetence almost did send me to the grave like old Grimes. “Nothing will kill a great employee faster than watching you tolerate a bad one”. Funnily enough, don’t get Grimesy about other people with money. Maybe that says more about where I get validation and value from.
Not really, I’m aware of life being unfair but that’s just life, I worked hard to crawl out of a very shit socioeconomic situation I was born and put into and I appreciate and value everything I have and how far I’ve come, when I see something I want but can’t afford it motivates me to work harder so that I can get it, not just feel jealous and complain about it
Generally, no. Especially not financial stuff. My upbringing shaped who I am even if it wasn’t an ideal situation. I’m proud of myself for rising above it. I’m not conventionally successful, but have a wonderful family now which means more than anything
We *did* struggle with infertility for many years though, and it got to the point where it seemed everyone was having kids except us. That was an exceptionally difficult time, feeling like we were never going to have the one thing we wanted more than anything. So I suppose it could be construed as jealousy of sorts. It’s not quite the same thing though because it was more to do with accepting my own inability to have children. Those were the cards I was dealt, and we found a way to have our family. Love isn’t fair, the universe owes us nothing.
I sometimes do because I resent the poverty and the abusive situations in my formative years that impacted on me reaching my full potential. I still got there eventually but like, my oldest friend who grew up in a supportive, well off household and never wanted for anything finished her doctorate at 25 and it took me until 27 to finish my masters (still dreaming of PhD). She has always acknowledged her privilege with absolute grace and is a sweetheart who works incredibly hard so I donÔÇÖt hold any jealousy for her, itÔÇÖs more resentment for what IÔÇÖve ÔÇ£missed outÔÇØ on.
I spend a lot of time thinking about how to give my future children my friends life instead of mine, itÔÇÖs the driving reason for everything I do even though they donÔÇÖt exist yet.
I’m actually Homer in that episode.
I am very grateful though, however I did set myself up to be this way, and did some hard yards on the setup
Homer is basically the boomer and grimes is the millennial.
The problem with this view is that it’s an endless game you can never win.
We are all somewhere in the middle with endless people luckier, harder working, who do better, and endless people less lucky who do worse.
If you were a little luckier, there would still be the same endless people a little luckier. It’s not worth thinking or worrying about.
I feel like Grimes particularly when it comes to older people and housing. They say it’s the youth that spend their money on avo toast, but it’s the people with equity that I see spending money without much thought. Many of these people who got into the market 10+ years ago haven’t even considered what sort of deposit and household income is required in 2023 for a house in Melbourne or Sydney. They couldn’t even closely estimate if they were on some game show, and there was money riding on their answer.
Life is simply unfairƒÉî
When I start naval-gazing like this I like to switch it up, and compare myself to someone who would be envious of me. Then, I try to be thankful.
I think I know what you mean. I have felt envy when good things happen to other people and I think ‘why don’t good things happen to me?’ I went through a lot of stress but eventually I got through it and now good things have happened to me and I’m really grateful. Give it time and things will happen for you.
Financially, I am Homer Simpson.
But in other aspects of my life, I am Frank Grimes.
It’s all about balance. Don’t compare yourself to others.
Oh grimey. Haha
Life is unfair. It may be shit at times but you just have to roll with the hand that life deals you and make the best of it.
Every damn day.
Sometimes I feel like Grimey when the disparity inevitably presents itself in day to day life but your happiness starts when you both realise and accept that life is unfair. Some people were just delt the better hand.
You can make yourself mad about it, piss and moan about it and become miserable trying to level up but you’re just wasting your energy.
Accept and take action towards what you value in life (not necessarily money) and you will feel at peace. If you’re not sure what your values are find some therapy exercises online. No matter who you are someone will always have more than you. As long as you’ve got your basics covered and you’re not in constant state of stress due to your environment you should be golden and have more than whatever percentage of the world are struggling to merely survive.
I’m happier being like the 30 year old boomer meme character.
Nope. Why would you not compare yourself to a billionaire but then compare to someone on $90k and think the worlds unfair. The lack of perspective
Grimey is my boy. ThatÔÇÖs been my life
I feel like Old Gil.
Do you ever feel like Vimes?
You can google that, I won’t explain it, but lemme just explain it without reference to Vimes…
Just explain it or don’t use a reference? Especially if you’re expecting it won’t be clear
I think Frank Grimes was a jerk who genuinely believed he was better then Homer, so felt wronged to see someone who was ÔÇ£beneath himÔÇØ doing better than him.
I feel like I get treated like that sometimes. I have a beautiful wife and kids, good career etc but I look like an ordinary Aussie guy, IÔÇÖm built more like a tradie so therefore I must be a ÔÇ£moronÔÇØ etc. I met my wife 20 years ago and have been a loyal partner and tried my best to treat her like a queen the whole time. I get paid well, but do these guys know I self learned how to write code at 10 years old (before the internet too) and went into full time work as a programmer at 16? My partner and I came from broken homes and grew up in relative poverty, but we worked hard to build ourselves up. Why are our kids so lovely? Because we raised them well (wife was SAHM for 8 years) all on our own with no support network. We did inherit some money because my mum died (at 63yo), I guess thatÔÇÖs some ÔÇ£luckÔÇØ hey?
No i do not feel like frank grimes. I feel like cartman from south park.
If they are near your socioeconomic status what do you have to be jealous about?
If you’re jealous of them, they’re not near your socioeconomic status.
Yes. I myself am a homer. I make an insane amount of money for very little work. And then I am also envious of people with inheritances or even self sufficient parents. ItÔÇÖs a bad way to think but IÔÇÖm a shit person so it makes sense to me
Everything is chaos, nothing is fair. You will make yourself too sad if you compare.
Not really. I acknowledge that life itself is unfair but not in a ÔÇÿwo is meÔÇÖ way. Lifes a bitch and then you die, IÔÇÖve accepted that. Some people live terrible lives, many are abused in horrific ways as children, many people die in painful tragic ways buried or burned or tortured alive. Terrible, abhorrent things happen every day, even this very moment, and it sucks. Life is so overwhelmingly unfair and unkind to so many who donÔÇÖt deserve it. And I certainly am no more deserving of the life and many privileges that I have.
So until I die, I try to enjoy myself as much as I can, try to improve the lives of those around me In whatever way I can, sometimes I do that well sometimes not so much. I do have shitty days and i love a good whinge, but I dont look at others who have more than me and feel hard done by because even though I dont have a single thing to my name, I feel very rich in my own way.
I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with acknowledging differences in people’s lives, in fact, it’s unrealistic for you to not compare yourself to otherwise.
However, dwelling on it is dedicating energy to something you don’t have any control over…
When I did door knocking we used a strategy, we wrote up a list of factors we couldn’t control, and a list of factors we could control. For example: I couldn’t control the weather, people’s attitudes, where I was knocking.
However! I could control how well prepared I am (if it was raining did I have a coat and umbrella?), My attitude, how many doors I knocked.
We addressed that there were factors out of our control and then moved on, and focused our energy on factors within our control. I hope this helps. ƒÿè
I even wear glasses and have a similar haircut, i am the embodiment of Grimes ƒÿé
Weird premise. If my matesÔÇÖ parents gave them $200K IÔÇÖd be totally stoked for them, definitely not jealous. Maybe you need some better friends OP.
That’s why don’t be Frank Grimes. Be Homer Simpsons. Stop taking life so seriously and do whatever the hell you want.
No never. They may have components of their lives that are great, but no doubt have just as many flaws, shitty things in their life. IÔÇÖll stick with focusing on my own life thanks.