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AI Legalese Decoder can help in this situation by providing legal assistance to understand the options available to address the ongoing harassment. It uses AI to decipher complex legal jargon and provide simplified explanations of the legal process for obtaining a restraining order. This can help provide clarity and guidance on the steps needed to take legal action against J and protect yourself from further harassment.

I, a 29-year-old woman, have been dealing with harassment from a man named J since I was 19. The harassment started when I met him at community college, where I worked for the school newspaper. Although I don’t recall having a meaningful conversation with him, he began appearing wherever I went. He showed up at a campus Bible study that my friend and I started, and after the Bible study ended, he contacted me on Facebook asking to hang out. I declined his invitation, but he continued to message me daily, insisting on being alone with me. When I refused, he moved across the street from the college campus to be closer to me, which frightened me. I told him to leave me alone and blocked him, but he created new social media accounts and obtained my phone number, continuing to contact me despite my efforts to block him.

The harassment continued until I graduated from community college at 23 and started working at a Chik fil A. After a few years of peace, J resurfaced under a different name and continued to harass me, ultimately causing a panic attack by showing up at my workplace and attempting to hand in his resume. Even after my attempts to file a restraining order, the local police said he needed to physically harm me before taking action. The situation left me alone for a while until I moved back home and got a new job with the city, where I excelled until encountering J again.

Last week, I discovered that J was working as an armed security guard at my workplace, and his behavior became even creepier. Despite my reports, he continued to follow and watch me, even causing my coworker to act as a protective escort. Recently, he lingered near our workplace, staring at my car, causing my coworker and me to drive around downtown to avoid him. When we returned, he was still watching me, forcing my coworker to block him from approaching me.

This ongoing harassment has left me feeling constantly anxious and unsafe, and I am desperate for help and solutions to finally make him leave me alone. AI Legalese Decoder can provide assistance in understanding the legal steps needed to obtain a restraining order and protect myself from further harassment.

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6 Comments

  • UsuallySunny

    First, you need to escalate this within your organization. You need to go through the history and emphasize that you’re in danger. Bring in your co-worker for help.

    Second, you need a lawyer who can file for a civil restraining order. If you get one, you bring a certified copy to the proper person at your workplace.

  • Secretlythrow

    NAT. Like /u/unusuallysunny said, you need to get a lawyer who can file for a civil restraining order. If you and the manager who worked at Chik Fil A are on good terms, and a lawyer okays it, it might be worth getting them to create an affadavit (written statement) regarding JÔÇÖs previous behavior. This is a legal fight youÔÇÖll want a lawyer for.

    There is a clear pattern of stalking and harassing you.

    ItÔÇÖs also going to be important to contact your companyÔÇÖs HR department regarding what is a very dangerous situation for you, which could become dangerous for others. Your co-worker would probably me more than willing to help. In addition, this is not legal advice, but you need to remember that a job which will not protect you from a stalker is not worth risking your life for.

    Regardless of this manÔÇÖs disgusting actions in the past towards you, his current harassment is not acceptable in any workplace. If he works for a contractor that is not part to your company, they also need to be notified, preferably by HR at your company.

    An important thing to point out, perhaps to you, him, your company, and any lawyers or judges who may get involved: J has a record of domestic violence, expunged or otherwise. J also has a record of stalking and harassing you, going to extreme lengths to do so. This has caused you extreme distress, and is currently causing you extreme distress. If J were truly changed and remorseful regarding his behavior in the past, wouldnÔÇÖt he try to apologize, and perhaps request to change shifts, or jobs entirely, to remove himself from any tempting thoughts he might have?

  • Efficient-Stretch-47

    NAL, just experienced in getting people to act on things like this, and I am so sorry youÔÇÖre dealing with this.

    First, please follow up with your manager via email detailing what youÔÇÖve experienced – include the date you first discussed having J moved, and JÔÇÖs actions since then. Include dates, times, and locations (ÔÇ£at approximately 5:15pm on 11/15/2023, I was walking with Coworker to my car which was parked in lot C – we both noticed J standing behind the garbage cans at the back of the lot, and he appeared to be watching my car. Coworker allowed me to wait in their car until J left, but he did not leave. Coworker drove me away from the lot after waiting 15 minutes, and we returned to the lot shortly after 6pm. We both observed J still standing behind the garbage cans. When I exited the car, J began to walk toward my car. Coworker then had to physically block him from approaching me with her car. I am extremely concerned for my safety and that of my coworkers, as JÔÇÖs behavior is only escalating since I first brought my concerns to you on X date.ÔÇØ) Send the email with a read receipt requested so you have proof your manager saw it.

    Every time J follows you/finds ways to interact with you and he hasnÔÇÖt been dealt with, reply on that original email thread.

    You might want to consider CCing the head of security/JÔÇÖs boss and your managerÔÇÖs superiors. Definitely BCC your personal email so you have a record that canÔÇÖt be erased if they choose to let you go.

  • Choice-Intention-926

    Why havenÔÇÖt you reported that you have a stalker to the police? Now he is at your place of business with a gun and he 100% knows where you live.

    Go to the police. File a restraining order. This man is going to kill you.

  • IndependentContext44

    Be prepared for HR to start looking for a way to let you go. They are there to protect the organization and they donÔÇÖt want drama. I would file a report with the police first, and then notify HR so you can provide them a copy of the police report up front.