- December 6, 2023
- Posted by: legaleseblogger
- Category: Related News
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Heading: Child Support and Custody Issues with Ex-Husband
I (35, f) am currently facing a situation where I do not have a court-mandated child support and custody order with my ex-husband (m, 34) with whom I share one child. Our marriage lasted for 10 years, during which I financially supported him and helped put him through school for the majority of that time. After 6 years, he started working.
It has been 4 years since our divorce, and I recently discovered that my ex-husband changed our custody agreement without my consent, altering it from a 50/50 arrangement to a 70/30 split. This sudden change has thrown my life schedule into disarray. As a result, I am now the primary custodial parent by default. Additionally, my ex-husband has refused to disclose his income, despite working full time. He only contributes $250 a month for our child’s support and does very little of the parenting labor, acting more as a “weekend dad”. In contrast, I am the one actively involved in our child’s daily life, participating in school activities, helping with homework, and engaging in conversations about their school day. Furthermore, I work full time and earn close to 6 figures.
I feel like I am being taken advantage of and that my ex-husband’s actions are prioritizing his convenience at the expense of my own well-being. Despite my efforts to have a conversation with him about the custody arrangement, it has been an uphill battle.
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Original content:
Heading: Legal Documents Can Be Confusing
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Wait until you can prove and document the custody you have. Usually that takes 6 months. Once you have that file to make that the court order. After file for child support. Say nothing.
[deleted]
File for child support through the courts.
Roll dice..u could very well end up paying instead depending on income.
Also, legally custody agreements cant be changed by either parent unless its first approved by the courts.
And lets be honest, 100k is really like 70k after taxes. But yes for purposes of CS calculator..GROSS is skewed number.
If you have to ask, your doing it for the wrong reasons
I’ve never seen when an entire thread gets deleted. That’s weird.
You need to consult an attorney and weigh your options. Depending on the laws in your state, you should be able to figure out a calculation based on combined incomes. What does he do for work/what is his title, you should at least be able to come up with an approximate amount of his income.
Also, how can he change custody? He still has to go through court for it to take effect, but what IÔÇÖm gathering is heÔÇÖs dumping the child and responsibilities onto you regardless. A man thinking parenting is optional and taking advantage of a womanÔǪ IÔÇÖm shocked ƒÖä
I imagine as primary parent youÔÇÖll still receive support despite making more, and you wouldnÔÇÖt be ordered to pay the father for doing less – which you have record of him paying you $250/mo as your baseline though its not considered ÔÇ£officialÔÇØ in the eyes of the law. Keep documenting the behaviors and parental time.
Unfortunately the law is part of the patriarchy and doesnÔÇÖt care if it suppresses women. As I understand, you canÔÇÖt argue who takes on more responsibility. Even what youÔÇÖll receive in child support wonÔÇÖt actually amount to the loss of income youÔÇÖll be unable to make with your free time allocated towards parental responsibilities or be enough for the rising costs of raising children.
Figure out the worst case scenarios and decide which one you can accept. If you want peace, accept responsibility and live as if heÔÇÖs a glorified babysitter. If you want established support, file and pull together your documents and get it set so you know what you have to work with and move forward with your life from there.
Yes. Change in circumstances should allow for a recalculation. They spend more time with you now, and he probably makes more money.
Yes.