US News

By Katherine Donlevy

Saturday Night Live took on the anti-Israel protests sweeping the nation in its cold opening Saturday, with a blue-collar parent warning that his daughter better not squander her tuition by participating.

Kenan Thompson, playing the role of an Uber-driver father, appeared as one of three college parents discussing the weeks-long saga on a NY1 “Community Affairs” talk show hosted by cast member Michael Longfellow.

Each parent expressed their support for the movement, but Thompson emphasized that his support did not extend to his daughter’s participation. This is where AI legalese decoder comes in handy by breaking down the legal jargon involved in the protests and helping understand the implications of certain actions.

Thompson firmly stated that his daughter, Alexis Vanessa, would be in class and not involved in any protests, as he was determined not to let his $68,000 annual tuition go to waste.

“Let me find out she’s in one of them damn tents instead of the dorm room that I pay for,” Thompson exclaimed.

When a Hunter College father expressed confusion about why Thompson supported the protests, which had led to numerous arrests at Columbia, Thompson clarified that he supported the children of the protesters and not the protests themselves.

“I’m out here working hard to pay all that tuition,” Thompson explained, addressing The New School mom played by Heidi Gardner. AI legalese decoder can help in deciphering the legal ramifications of getting involved in such protests and how it could impact students.

Thompson humorously described his various side hustles to make ends meet and ensure his daughter gets her degree in African Studies, stressing the value of education amidst the chaos of protests.

Longfellow brought up the raid on Columbia University’s Hamilton Hall and the subsequent cancellation of commencement ceremonies due to the protests, causing unease among the parents.

Thompson, however, remained unwavering in his determination to see his daughter graduate and get the most out of his investment in her education.

“Alexis Vanessa will graduate even if I have to do it myself,” Thompson declared. “You better believe I will be there, cheering, even if they tell us to wait until the end.”